Wicked How-To’s

Ok today I’m just going to show you a bunch of badass ways to open a beer bottle with everything except the fucking opener–this is so you will look like a bad ass and pussy will rain down upon you from the heavens. No, seriously, this will get you laid: do you have any idea how impressed girls at a party will be if you tell them that you know 20 different ways (and I’m literally going to show you more than 20 different ways, I’m not kidding) to open a beer bottle and then proceed to prove it to them?! That’s more awesome than knowing 20 different ways to kill a man with your pinky finger! Ok, let’s get started:

20 ways to open a beer bottle

Some of these are pretty self-explanatory, some of them will be covered below in addition to even more ways you can open a beer bottle beyond what you’ll see in this video:

I’ll tell you right now, in case you can’t quite get it from the video, how they’re doing a lot of them: simply place the underside edge of the bottle cap on the edge of a hard, flat surface like a table and smack the top of the cap with your fist, that’s it. Make sure you’ve got a solid grip on the bottle so the force of the blow actually forces the cap up instead of forcing the bottle away from the edge.

How to open a beer bottle with a CD

This is one that you see them do multiple times, and also the one that I thought was the coolest :

How to open a beer bottle with a piece of paper

How to open a beer bottle with a lighter

How to pop open a beer bottle with a speed opener

Professional bartender’s trick here, I thought this was kind of nifty, he’s a bit long-winded but that’s just because he wants to make sure he teaches you how to do it properly, which is awesome:

How to open a beer with another beer

How to open a bottle of beer with a chainsaw

Ohhh yes, you should definitely bust this move out the next time you’re drunk:

How to open a beer with your TEETH!

Bonus: how to open a bottle of Champagne with a sword (or large knife–a chef’s knife will work

And just so you know that it can just as easily be done with the knife you’ve got in the kitchen: